Honeymoon Hopewalk

Today is the last day of my honeymoon, and as I said previously I wanted to do my Hopewalk here this year. I’ve actually only left the cabin twice all week because wouldn’t you know it the day before we went away I became quite ill and have been either sleeping or coughing my way […]

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Hopewalk 2021

This year I decided I wanted to take part again as it is such an important cause to me, only I can’t bring Charlie or my dad to cheer me on as I’m going to be doing the walk while I am on my honeymoon!

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So happy I didn’t succeed.

Eighteen months ago I tried to overdose on sleeping pills and antidepressants so that everything would stop. Six months ago I broke down. I got diagnosed with PTSD and opened up about my trauma for the first time. I’m not going to say life is sunshine and rainbows now because it isn’t.. well sometimes it […]

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Celebration or confrontation..

It was my sisters 30th birthday, she went away for a week but had a big old gathering when she returned to celebrate with our very large extended family. I was really sad that I missed her actual birthday the day before, but was struggling with some pains and wasn’t sure I could make it. […]

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No strings attached.

So I’m home alone while my partner is gone for the week, dog sitting for his parents. I had just reheated some pasta for my dinner and wanted to put something on that wasn’t going to need a big emotional investment from me, so I went to comedies on Prime and ended up selecting No […]

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Bridal hair trial today.

Ok so my previous post was pretty doom and gloom, but that’s how I’ve been feeling and that’s ok. This morning I was dreading my appointment to try some hairstyles for the wedding but silly old me, I’ve never left my hairdressers anything but happy. We had a good natter, looked at some pictures for […]

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Am I lost?

When you’re young you have such firm ideas of how life should go. What age makes you a grown up, what it is that grown ups do.. houses, kids, marriages, jobs. I was so convinced that by my mid 20’s I would be a mother. All my life I’ve been great with kids, the go […]

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Return to work

I’m not sure if I’ve really mentioned this other than in my PTSD specific posts, but I have been signed off work since the end of January/beginning of Feb. I’m a little hazy on the specific date but it was around that time. I’d been struggling mentally for a while, and though I was already […]

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Affirmations

I didn’t do any affirmations for two or three weeks, it felt like too much pressure, but I think it was because I had had a relapse of some of my more intense PTSD symptoms so I just had to give myself the time and space needed to cope, and deal with those. ‘I am […]

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Affirmations

Does anyone else feel silly doing these? Maybe it’s because it’s so new to me but it can be oddly confronting, telling yourself you deserve good things, that you can do the things you want to, get what you want out of life. But, I am going to try and keep it up. We forgot […]

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Positive Affirmations

Do I deserve good things? Some days I get mad that I would even need to consider this, of course I do, doesn’t everyone.. But in the cold light of day, and the heavy dark that the night brings with it, it’s much easier to believe that I don’t. To lean into, and even rely […]

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