Eighteen months ago I tried to overdose on sleeping pills and antidepressants so that everything would stop. Six months ago I broke down. I got diagnosed with PTSD and opened up about my trauma for the first time. I’m not going to say life is sunshine and rainbows now because it isn’t.. well sometimes it […]Read More So happy I didn’t succeed.
It was my sisters 30th birthday, she went away for a week but had a big old gathering when she returned to celebrate with our very large extended family. I was really sad that I missed her actual birthday the day before, but was struggling with some pains and wasn’t sure I could make it. […]Read More Celebration or confrontation..
I’m not sure if I’ve really mentioned this other than in my PTSD specific posts, but I have been signed off work since the end of January/beginning of Feb. I’m a little hazy on the specific date but it was around that time. I’d been struggling mentally for a while, and though I was already […]Read More Return to work
I didn’t do any affirmations for two or three weeks, it felt like too much pressure, but I think it was because I had had a relapse of some of my more intense PTSD symptoms so I just had to give myself the time and space needed to cope, and deal with those. ‘I am […]Read More Affirmations
I have suffered with depression, anxiety and ptsd for a long time. I try to be honest about my mental health but even when I wasn’t as forthcoming, I really enjoyed doing what I could to help other people with their struggles, whether it was just being a shoulder to cry on, buying their favourite […]Read More Doing an Instagram giveaway – mental health inspired.
Do I deserve good things? Some days I get mad that I would even need to consider this, of course I do, doesn’t everyone.. But in the cold light of day, and the heavy dark that the night brings with it, it’s much easier to believe that I don’t. To lean into, and even rely […]Read More Positive Affirmations
June is post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) Awareness Month. In the UK it is believed that 1 in 3 people will have experienced a traumatic event in their life. PTSD can affect anyone who has been exposed to a traumatic event – an event which provoked fear, helplessness, or horror in response to the threat […]Read More PTSD Awareness Month
I wanted to go out somewhere nice with the dog, somewhere we would have to drive to so we could both be in nature and have fun exploring. The weather is certainly good for it, though me being me I’d have to lather on the factor 50 before we left. I woke up to my […]Read More Not the Sunday I was expecting.
So, I’ve had a shower for the first time since Sunday. Is that gross? Sure. Did I smell? Absolutely. Does knowing that change anything? No, depression doesn’t care, and you pretty much just feel worse cause you know you’re being gross. I brushed my teeth, put some undies and a face mask on (my skin […]Read More Showering is hard these days.
Feeling reflective and wanted to share some of the positivity and love I’m feeling today during some darker times. Three years ago today we got engaged. At this point in time we should have been married for about seven months, but as you know a global pandemic happened. We’re hoping the wedding goes ahead this […]Read More Three years ago..
I’ve had 7 sessions, and my scores have gone from 9/10 to 5. This might not sound like a lot but it is a huge difference in my day to day life. It’s changed how I think about my trauma, how I feel about it, how I deal with flashbacks and intrusive thoughts. It’s been […]Read More New diagnosis, acknowledging and asking for help with PTSD – part three.
Opening up was difficult after holding everything in for so long, but it was also freeing to finally tell someone. It was an emotional conversation, I cried, we cuddled together, and once I was done speaking we stayed that way for a while. I was physically and mentally drained, and I can’t imagine how it […]Read More New diagnosis, acknowledging and asking for help with PTSD – part two.
Around fifteen years ago, I was on a night out with my friends. My drink was spiked, and I was sexually assaulted. I remember some parts of the evening but have lost large periods of time that I don’t know if I’ll ever remember entirely. The assault was reported to the police, and my mum […]Read More New diagnosis, acknowledging and asking for help with PTSD.