I can’t cope.

Getting the diagnosis was a good thing because it was affecting my life and I do believe I needed to address it.

Seven days to go!

I got this email today. Am I still excited to do this challenge? Yes. Have I prepared at all? Nope! I have got my t-shirt and like the idea of using the mile marker. I guess I have a week to get some gentle walks in so at least I’m not starting from scratch. Wish […]

So happy I didn’t succeed.

Eighteen months ago I tried to overdose on sleeping pills and antidepressants so that everything would stop. Six months ago I broke down. I got diagnosed with PTSD and opened up about my trauma for the first time. I’m not going to say life is sunshine and rainbows now because it isn’t.. well sometimes it […]

Return to work

I’m not sure if I’ve really mentioned this other than in my PTSD specific posts, but I have been signed off work since the end of January/beginning of Feb. I’m a little hazy on the specific date but it was around that time. I’d been struggling mentally for a while, and though I was already […]

Not the Sunday I was expecting.

I wanted to go out somewhere nice with the dog, somewhere we would have to drive to so we could both be in nature and have fun exploring. The weather is certainly good for it, though me being me I’d have to lather on the factor 50 before we left. I woke up to my […]

Three years ago..

Feeling reflective and wanted to share some of the positivity and love I’m feeling today during some darker times. Three years ago today we got engaged. At this point in time we should have been married for about seven months, but as you know a global pandemic happened. We’re hoping the wedding goes ahead this […]

New diagnosis, acknowledging and asking for help with PTSD – part three.

I’ve had 7 sessions, and my scores have gone from 9/10 to 5. This might not sound like a lot but it is a huge difference in my day to day life. It’s changed how I think about my trauma, how I feel about it, how I deal with flashbacks and intrusive thoughts. It’s been […]

New diagnosis, acknowledging and asking for help with PTSD – part two.

Opening up was difficult after holding everything in for so long, but it was also freeing to finally tell someone. It was an emotional conversation, I cried, we cuddled together, and once I was done speaking we stayed that way for a while. I was physically and mentally drained, and I can’t imagine how it […]

New diagnosis, acknowledging and asking for help with PTSD.

Around fifteen years ago, I was on a night out with my friends. My drink was spiked, and I was sexually assaulted. I remember some parts of the evening but have lost large periods of time that I don’t know if I’ll ever remember entirely. The assault was reported to the police, and my mum […]